Today on 'Finding the Guardian of Your Soul,' Lisa and Benjamin Shield delve into the complex world of ambivalence in romantic relationships. In this episode, titled "Ambivalence," Lisa and Benjamin explore the simultaneous positive and negative emotions that can halt women seeking love in their tracks.
Listen in as Benjamin defines ambivalence and explains how it leads to overthinking, resistance to new relationships, and dismissing well-suited matches based on a rigid checklist. Lisa opens up about the challenges faced by high-achieving women in their program, including fears related to personal imbalances and complex life circumstances, from medical conditions to navigating parental roles.
Today on 'Finding the Guardian of Your Soul,' Lisa and Benjamin Shield delve into the complex world of ambivalence in romantic relationships. In this episode, titled "Ambivalence.MP3," Lisa and Benjamin explore the simultaneous positive and negative emotions that can halt women seeking love in their tracks.
Listen in as Benjamin defines ambivalence and explains how it leads to overthinking, resistance to new relationships, and dismissing well-suited matches based on a rigid checklist. Lisa opens up about the challenges faced by high-achieving women in their program, including fears related to personal imbalances and complex life circumstances, from medical conditions to navigating parental roles.
Discover how the Shields emphasize creating a vivid vision of an ideal relationship to combat worst-case scenarios, with unique examples like living apart or maintaining separate households. Moreover, learn why they believe successful relationships require work and the importance of vulnerability and seeing one's partner's internal beauty.
Lisa shares personal insights and exercises, like "a day in the life" visualization or vision boards, to help you manifest your ideal partner. She also encourages listeners to seek connection and inspiration through programs like theirs. Tune in for this heartfelt episode filled with real success stories, practical advice, and an invitation to reimagine your love life. Visit lisashield.com for a free 45-minute presentation and schedule your breakthrough call today. Join us as we navigate the highs and lows of love and explore the true path to finding your guardian of the soul.
Lisa Shield [00:00:01]:
Hi, I'm Lisa Shield.
Benjamin Shield [00:00:02]:
And I'm Benjamin Shield.
Lisa Shield [00:00:04]:
And this is getting inside the right male mind, where I explore my husband's beautiful male mind. He has the ability to bridge both the masculine and the feminine perspectives and state the masculine perspective in a really eloquent, loving, beautiful way. So I have spent almost half a century with this man, and I think he has one of the most amazing minds I've ever encountered. And so I designed this podcast so that I could share his mind.
Benjamin Shield [00:00:48]:
Just a small edit. A quarter of a century.
Lisa Shield [00:00:51]:
What did I say? Half a century.
Benjamin Shield [00:00:52]:
Half a century.
Lisa Shield [00:00:52]:
Oh, no. Oh my gosh, I wish. If only a quarter of a century. You're right, baby. All right, so let's dive in. We are going to talk today about ambivalence. We are seeing in our mastermind course. We have a year long mastermind program where we work directly with some of our amazing graduates of our core program, our six month core program.
Lisa Shield [00:01:26]:
They then go on to work with Benjamin and me directly for a year. And what we see in this group is that some, not all, but some of these women are ambivalent. They sign up for our programs, they even sign up for the mastermind, and yet down deep, they're not moving forward, and they don't understand why. They're stuck in their own stories and they're repeating patterns and they're not moving forward. So you've narrowed this down to ambivalence, and can you explain what ambivalence is and what you're seeing with this particular group of women?
Benjamin Shield [00:02:13]:
Well, ambivalence is about having contradictory feelings, particularly in this case, about pursuing a romantic relationship. And it's contradictory because these women, these highly successful, accomplished women, have signed up and have invested time and funds and energy to find a romantic relationship, yet something is holding them back. My sense is that many of these women are doing exactly the right things. They're reading profiles very carefully, they're reaching out to men that they're interested in. They're going to zoom dates, they're having the in person dates, and they could be going on date after date after date, and it never goes further than that. And they're wondering, why isn't it happening for them? And my sense is that there is an ambivalence in that. Yes, they're showing up. They want this so badly, maybe more than anything in their lives, yet there's something holding them back.
Benjamin Shield [00:03:33]:
And I think one of the things that's holding them back is that these successful, accomplished women have created a very good life for themselves. They've decorated their homes. They may have certain schedules for their kids that work. They have their friends, their hobbies, their careers, all of these things. And the image I have is that a woman could be standing on one cliff and the thought of a relationship is on another cliff, and there's a chasm in between. And sometimes it's hard to know how to take that first step. And one of the things that, and we'll go into, really, how to solve that. But in addition to setting up their lives in such a comfortable way, because, again, these are intelligent, attractive, accomplished women, and yet they just feel that they're getting in their own way or it's just not happening for them.
Benjamin Shield [00:04:51]:
For some women, they have multiple fears. And one fear is about time constraint, balancing a demanding career in personal life, maybe a family life. Maybe they're raising kids. And how are they. I mean, and they're stretched. They don't have an extra minute. How are they going to suddenly move into. Meld into a relationship that might be demanding on their time? It can just cause stress.
Lisa Shield [00:05:27]:
And, honey, can you define, just to give a very, before you go forward, a very specific definition of what ambivalence is? Because I think a lot of people.
Benjamin Shield [00:05:36]:
Don'T know that well, it's experiencing simultaneous positive and negative emotions at the same time. And the positive emotions are, you know, I deeply want relationship, life, partnership, the guardian of my soul relationship. And the negatives can be a multitude of fears. And the unfortunate thing is, when there's ambivalence and there's positive thoughts and negative thoughts, usually the negative thoughts will win out. They become more powerful.
Lisa Shield [00:06:17]:
So it's wanting something and not wanting it at the same time.
Benjamin Shield [00:06:22]:
Exactly. And it can become paralytic. People, you know, can be going through the motions, but they're really paralyzed in moving forward.
Lisa Shield [00:06:31]:
Well, then they bring it into their dating. Right. Like they even we see certain women who. Their ambivalence makes them waffles so they'll meet a great guy, but then they almost overthink it. And they get caught up in this whole inner dialogue of flip flopping or waffling back and forth and back and forth. I can think of one particular client who does this a lot, and I can't even imagine. It must be crazy making inside her head because she wants this so, so, so badly. And yet the minute she gets close to a man, she starts, well, I don't know.
Lisa Shield [00:07:13]:
And what about this? And what about that? And, you know, she's already overthinking it. So much before she's even really gone on more than a couple of dates with somebody.
Benjamin Shield [00:07:23]:
Yeah. And the unfortunate thing is, the more she likes someone, the more she finds someone who's on her level, who can be her greatest teacher, who could be the guardian of her soul, the more resistance she begins to have, because the closer she becomes to that relationship, which is this fearful unknown of what is it going to look like? How am I going to fit it in? Is it going to last? Is it going to be like my last relationships, all of those things, or.
Lisa Shield [00:07:55]:
Am I going to be bored?
Benjamin Shield [00:07:56]:
Exactly.
Lisa Shield [00:07:58]:
The one thing I see is that she will. It's so funny, because when I talk to her on calls, what she'll do is she'll start telling me negative things about this person, and then I'll say, well, then don't go on another date. You know, why waste your time? And then she'll say, but our conversations are amazing. And, you know, I just don't like, I don't know if we share enough in common or whatever, but he makes me laugh, and we can talk for hours. And so the minute I, you know, go in her direction, she pulls in the other direction. And that's a great example of ambivalence in action. Right. The minute we were on a call the other day, and she was like, well, I don't know.
Lisa Shield [00:08:53]:
He doesn't have this. I don't know about that. You know, I'm concerned about these things, but. And the minute I said, well, then, if there's not enough in common, don't waste your time. I'd rather have you going on dates with men who, who had potential. No, but there's all these other things. I was just like, okay, right.
Benjamin Shield [00:09:15]:
And I think one thing that gets in the way and great ambivalence is that someone could have a checklist and there could be a great guy sitting across from her, and he may not meet a couple of those boxes that she wants checked off and dismisses that person.
Lisa Shield [00:09:37]:
Well, but then she doesn't. Right, but then she doesn't. That's the ambivalence. It's like she doesn't come in and say, look, he's got these really good qualities, but these things, I think, are deal breakers. I don't think, you know, I don't think he's my guy. No, it's like. But he's got. He doesn't have this, but he has this, you know, and it's like there's an ambivalence, not just about wanting a relationship but there's an ambivalence about each guy that she comes in contact with.
Lisa Shield [00:10:07]:
So. Yeah, so you were saying that time constraints can be a big one that gets, you know, that women use as a reason, you know, as a way of being ambivalent. What's another one?
Benjamin Shield [00:10:23]:
Well, I think that it's very appropriate, and we encourage the women in the program to have high standards, but sometimes the high standards are so specific that it rules out extraordinary men. And they could decide not to have a second date where if they went on a second or third date, they would see all these fascinating things about this person that they may have missed just because they may not have checked a couple boxes. But they could be extraordinary people. Extraordinary people.
Lisa Shield [00:11:03]:
And it's actually just a way of keeping people at. Keeping men at arms length and not letting them get close enough to get to know them. So that's another way that their ambivalence, they set these unreasonably high standards, or they just set standards that are so out of the ordinary. I had one woman in our mid tier, like our middle program, and she was an attractive woman. I'm not saying she wasn't pretty, but she would only reach out and communicate with that upper 10% of the handsomest men online. Now, she herself wasn't in the upper 10% of women online. And so I, you know, I said, look, those guys are getting 80% of the messages from every woman who's dating online. And, you know, you're responding, you're competing with 80% of the women online.
Lisa Shield [00:12:16]:
And there's all these other men who are fascinating, who are amazing. And she would. I know, but I just can't. And that was her ambivalence. She really doesn't want a relationship.
Benjamin Shield [00:12:28]:
Yeah. And when she said, I just can't, she meant, I just can't.
Lisa Shield [00:12:32]:
Yeah, I just can't. But she doesn't want a relationship. She's got these impossibly high standards. And I do see women who are not very attractive. You know, they're, they're attractive enough, but they are not, you know, supermodels. And, I mean, we lived in LA. I'm a realist. When I was dating, I looked around at the competition, and I said, you know, Lisa, you really have to think about who are the men that are reaching out to you, and you need to open up your, you know, criteria, your range, because I really did want a relationship.
Lisa Shield [00:13:11]:
I had no ambivalence. None. And so I was very realistic, and I thought, I'm 40, you know, I'm 39 years old. Most of the men who are looking at me are going to be five to ten years older than me, and I want a very masculine, mature man anyway. Right. And so I opened up my criteria and dated men ten years older.
Benjamin Shield [00:13:39]:
And I'm nine years older.
Lisa Shield [00:13:40]:
You're nine years older. But I also felt like I would have so much more, so many more opportunities if I did that. And that was a sign of my lack of ambivalence. I wasn't ambivalent. I wanted to have an opportunity to really meet a high caliber man. But I also knew if I was competing with men and I didn't want kids, that was another thing. And some men who would have been closer to my age may still have wanted families and children or had children. So all of those things, but I wanted this so badly, and I had no ambivalence.
Lisa Shield [00:14:24]:
So I opened up all that criteria and I still had high standards. I mean, look at who I wound up with. But I also created a wide enough field that I could find a high quality man who might have been, you know, who was a little bit older, but who brought so much more than other guys did. So I wasn't. That. That's the difference between somebody who's not ambivalent and somebody who has unreasonably high standards. We had a client who didn't just want to have a guy who was changing things stateside, like making a difference in the world locally or even across the country. She wanted a world game changer, somebody who was influencing and impacting the world.
Lisa Shield [00:15:22]:
Well, that's not who she's with. She's with an absolutely wonderful man who adores her. And she found out after she dated a couple of these big CEO's, they didn't have time for her and they.
Benjamin Shield [00:15:39]:
Wouldn'T have been good partners anyway.
Lisa Shield [00:15:41]:
No, no.
Benjamin Shield [00:15:43]:
I think what we're looking for and thinking about something you said about attractiveness, we want from the other person the same thing we should be doing ourselves, which is really seeing that beauty emanate from the inside out, not from looking at the outside. And hopefully that it will be on the inside as well. The most successful relationships we've seen are people that may not have been matched. Like, if you were to say this person and this person, they're physically perfect together. There are a lot of very different, you know, wonderful, successful relationships where people are quite different and. But they see the beauty from the inside out, and that's the beauty that lasts.
Lisa Shield [00:16:36]:
Yeah. And also, I do think when I look at most of our couples, they're equal in physical attractiveness. I mean, I say to people, look, Benjamin and I aren't supermodels. We're just a nice looking jewish couple. You know, I mean, above average, I think. But certainly we're not, like, you know, gonna. Gonna be seen on the tabloids or something, but we're still a lovely couple because we look, you know, we match each other in our level of attractiveness, and we've both gotten more attractive as we've gotten older.
Benjamin Shield [00:17:14]:
It's true.
Lisa Shield [00:17:15]:
Yeah. So what, another way, you know, that women are, you know, are ambivalent, is they? They're afraid to be vulnerable, and they. They are ambivalent because they want intimacy and closeness. They're craving this emotionally naked, deep connection, but at the same time, they themselves won't take their walls down.
Benjamin Shield [00:17:43]:
Yeah. And I think a lot of the successful, accomplished, intelligent women in our program come from the corporate world, and they learn not to be vulnerable. In fact, they learn to have masculine energy. And so switching that to that unknown, being vulnerable, it's just that it's being vulnerable. It's not just sharing, you know, stories and feeling. It's being deeply vulnerable, which means that there has to be trust and safety on the, you know, for someone to receive that and to feel that, to be able to share, and also just.
Lisa Shield [00:18:31]:
A willingness to take down your walls and start opening up. I remember, and I do think that there's a point inside of each of us where we may consciously or unconsciously say, look, I'm done pretending. I'm done trying to impress somebody. This is what I have to offer. And I hope that the right person really sees my dearness, sees my sweetness, sees my vulnerability. And I think a lot of us want somebody to come along and get us to take down our walls. But I think that it really starts with wanting this so badly that you give yourself permission to take down your walls.
Benjamin Shield [00:19:22]:
Right.
Lisa Shield [00:19:22]:
I remember one of our former coaches. She was saying that, you know, she had gone through our program at all, and she was so afraid to share about her past with people. She didn't want men to see her past because she had a very strong religious upbringing and all, and she didn't. She was so afraid. She had left her church. She had cut off relations with her parents, and she was so afraid that if a man learned about any of that, that he would reject her because he would think that she was somehow flawed. So she masked it with humor and affability and sweetness and all these other things. And then finally I just said, look, you have to get emotionally naked.
Lisa Shield [00:20:11]:
And she did. You know, she gave herself permission to do it, and then immediately after that, she met her fiance.
Benjamin Shield [00:20:21]:
Yeah. And I think a lot of women are afraid of replicating old relationships, old patterns. There's one of. One of our clients has been married four times and in four terrible marriages. And one of the things we do in the program is to look at all the significant relationships and to see what we've settled for and to know that we could never settle for those things again. We call them the final five. And so she found right now she's dating the most wonderful man. She's happier than she's ever been, and she's not settling.
Benjamin Shield [00:21:10]:
And she knows she's not going to replicate those patterns because of the work she's done in the course.
Lisa Shield [00:21:17]:
You know, she, like all of us, has certain things, you know, has certain situations in her life that are a bit complex with a child and all, you know, some of the women listening have children who, for whatever reasons, are struggling, and that's part of the package that they come along with. This gentleman is so sweet about all of that. He's so open and accepting of her particular situation, and she was also concerned about bringing that into a new relationship, as we all would be. We have another client who has some alopecia from a. From an autoimmune disease, and it's alopecia. No. What is it? Is it loss of pair?
Benjamin Shield [00:22:10]:
Yes.
Lisa Shield [00:22:11]:
Yeah. Okay. And she has to wear some hair extensions and things to compensate. And she was a little worried about a man learning about that. And the men have been lovely. She's met some wonderful men who don't care. She has a beautiful personality. It hasn't mattered at all.
Lisa Shield [00:22:33]:
These things that. So the women who embrace, they're, you know, who embrace all of themselves and are able to be vulnerable, even though they're afraid. Or some clients with herpes, you know, that's a big one that our clients could use that, you know, to be ambivalent and use that as a way of not, you know, sharing with a man or keeping men at a distance because of that, when they look, you know, when our clients learn how to open up and embrace that and share that, we actually have the client who shared that with a boyfriend, and he was like, I have herpes, and I was just waiting to tell you about it. So, you know, we just. It's so lovely. But these are things in the past that, you know, have held these women back and gotten in the way of intimacy. And all. So, yeah, past experiences can definitely be an excuse and become a way of being ambivalent.
Benjamin Shield [00:23:39]:
And some, you know, many of our women come from the corporate background or have really devoted themselves to their career. And it's hard to switch gears. You know, they've been building, building, and they have very little extra time, particularly if they have kids or other obligations, taking care of parents or whatever it might be. Things going on in their own lives. And the thought of getting into a relationship that might diminish their career, their career advancement, or what they've worked for needs to be maintained, that there may not be time. There's that fear.
Lisa Shield [00:24:31]:
Well, the other thing is giving up their independence. And I think most people do not realize, number one, when you're in a relationship, you do become, at best, interdependent. But two people in a relationship depend on each other. There's no way around that. That's what a relationship is. You would be if two independent people just maintained their independence. You wouldn't have an intimate, connected, romantic relationship. It would be very distant and cold.
Lisa Shield [00:25:17]:
And being in, you know, interdependent.
Benjamin Shield [00:25:23]:
Is.
Lisa Shield [00:25:23]:
So vulnerable because over this quarter of a century, I don't know what I would do without you. There's so many things that you do for me in this relationship, so many ways. We take care of each other little, you know, big things, like from doing the taxes and handling the financial stuff and paying all the invoices.
Benjamin Shield [00:25:53]:
Even beyond the tangible. I mean, you were gone for two days for, you know, appointments in Los Angeles. It left such a huge hole, you know? I mean, and when I'm away, it's the same thing. And so. And there's the tangible and the intangible.
Lisa Shield [00:26:15]:
Well, there's just, you know, our souls are woven together. Even if it's just curling up on the sofa at the end of the day and you're not there beside me, even when you say, you know, I think I'm going to go to bed now. And I'm like, oh, a part of me is like, don't go to bed yet. You're supposed to be next to me. No, it's really. It's something that people don't realize. I mean, we get done at the end of a q and a call, and we'll go, we'll look at each other and say, you want to go over to El Nido and just grab a quick bite. It's just knowing that there's.
Lisa Shield [00:26:58]:
That you have your best friend there to go and just hang out with. It's we never feel lonely or alone, but you build that dependence on each other. And I think some people, especially these very, these women who pride themselves on being independent, they're so afraid of becoming dependent on a man or a man becoming dependent on them.
Benjamin Shield [00:27:25]:
Very true. Very true. And I think a big one is that some women have never seen an example of a relationship they would want to emulate.
Lisa Shield [00:27:39]:
Yeah.
Benjamin Shield [00:27:42]:
There aren't a lot of models of great relationships. So they see it with their parents. Maybe their parents were unhappy, their friends may be getting divorces, and why would they put themselves in that position?
Lisa Shield [00:27:57]:
Yeah, I mean, they just see they're ambivalent because they've never seen an example or maybe one or two. But when you think about all the people we know and how few really, really amazing relationships we see, it's absolutely incredible to think how few people really have great relationships. And I'm just going to digress for half a second and say that the reason for that is not because we can't have great relationships. It's because of this myth that two people are supposed to just fall in love and live happily ever after and not have to do any work in this part of their lives. We work at a job. We work to raise wonderful children. We study to learn how to play an instrument or speak a language. Why wouldn't you go to the gym to maintain your body? Why wouldn't you do some kind of work in this part of your life to get this right? So, well, what are some ways, babe, that women can get past their ambivalence?
Benjamin Shield [00:29:12]:
Well, what I encourage the women in the program to do is really to sit back, close their eyes and picture what the idealized relationship for them would be. Because I think one of the fears is that, well, someone's going to. I'm going to move into their house or they're going to move into mine. What furniture do I have to get rid of? What if they stay up late and I go to bed early? All of these things that, or what.
Lisa Shield [00:29:42]:
If they take advantage of me financially, like my ex did? Suddenly he loses his job or he gets sick and I'm a caretaker again? You have to get past these worst case scenarios.
Benjamin Shield [00:29:58]:
Well, I think it's so important to, instead of just thinking about, this is what a relationship is, what a relationship should be, think about what the idealized relationship would be for you. In other words, when I wrote my profile, dating profile, more than 22 years ago now, I said I came out of a brief but not a happy marriage, and I wasn't looking to get married again. In fact, I wrote in my profile that some of the most successful relationships are unconventional ones, and that even living in separate houses, and for me, at the time, at that moment in time, that was my idealized relationship, having time to myself. I had been a bachelor for a while, and for me, that was my comfort level. Anything more would have been out of my comfort level, and I may have been ambivalent in pulling away. So for some women, it's like, well, maybe we live in a large house and we have date night two nights or three nights a week, or we live in different houses and we get together on the weekends, or we go on trips together, or that we move in together. And what Lisa and I did after the first year we knew each other, I said, go find us a house. And so it wasn't her place or my place.
Benjamin Shield [00:31:37]:
We even got rid of all of our furniture, just about everything we put on the front lawn for a yard sale, which is essentially giving it away. And we started fresh. So all the furniture we picked, and we still do, we choose together, whether it's the color of the sheets or a couch or something like that, we do it together, brings us closer. So it's being honest with ourselves of what our comfort level is. What would it look like? And if we can create that dream of what it looks like, then reality can begin to take form in that dream. But unless we have that dream, that vision that, you know, idealized, this is my comfort level right now, and it could change a week from now. When I wrote my profile, separate houses, things like that, not wanting to get married, all of that changed when I met Lisa. So, I mean, it would have been ridiculous being in separate houses.
Benjamin Shield [00:32:48]:
I want to wake up next to her. I want to go to sleep next to her. I want to be with her throughout the day. And we got married because I didn't want to just call her my girlfriend or my significant other or my partner. I'm proud to call Lisa my wife. Visions can change, but the important thing is to create that vision for yourself, even if it seems unreasonable, even if it seems, well, no one's going to want to do that. Don't believe it. You know, create it for yourself and then see who you.
Benjamin Shield [00:33:25]:
What you attract.
Lisa Shield [00:33:26]:
And also, as you're creating the vision, especially if you write like, I. One of the things I love to do is have women write something called a day in the life with your ideal partner. And so, you know, getting up in the morning, the sun's pouring through the windows, the dog jumps on the bed. You know, he brings you coffee, you know, whatever. Or you go into the kitchen and he's making breakfast. And whatever your dream is, but bringing that to life and feel it, not just writing it, but feeling it. What would it feel like to wake up in the morning and smell breakfast cooking in the kitchen and walk in and see your guy there putting breakfast on the table and sitting down together? You really want to feel what that would be like for you. When I did my day in the life, I actually wrote many things that came to life.
Lisa Shield [00:34:30]:
So Benjamin and I have two dogs, which was something I envisioned. I envisioned that we would live and work in the same home and that we would have offices on our property. So we would both, like, he'd go to his office, and I'd go to my office, and, you know, a lot of things that I saw for in my vision actually came true. So it was beautiful. So write that vision. Also, you can do a vision board. As much as I used to think that they were really silly and trite, it gives you a visual. You can put it in your bedroom or, you know, a place where you see it every day.
Lisa Shield [00:35:16]:
You know, the. The beautiful words. Happiness, joy, togetherness, babies. Our new home. You know, you can cut those things out, and then you can have beautiful pictures of the wedding ring, the dress you want, the vacations you want to take, the, you know, whatever it is. And so you see that visual reminder. And then the last thing I would say, and this could actually be the most important piece of all, is doing a program like ours. Because when you do a course like ours, you are in a group of other women, like minded women, women with similar backgrounds to yours, professional women, women who, you know, are very much like you, struggling with the same obstacles and situations you're struggling with.
Lisa Shield [00:36:16]:
And what you will see is you will witness them facing challenges, finding their guys, getting engaged, getting married, you know? And as you like on our q and a calls, every time that people come on the q and a calls, they share a win, and then they ask a question. And the wins are, oh, my God, I'm dating two of the most amazing men, and I never knew these guys were online, but Benjamin's profile is getting some amazing attention, and these men are really taking the time to read it. And I've never dated guys like this before, so you'll hear them, and it will inspire you, and it will make you believe that you can have this, too. I remember when I was starting this business, and I was, you know, I had been coaching one on one. I'd been sitting in an office all by myself. And that's what we do. We get in a vacuum, right? We get in our own little bubble. And what happens is we're isolated and alone.
Lisa Shield [00:37:30]:
And when that brings us down, because there's no inspiration, there's no new thought, there's no new opportunity. And so I hired. I joined a coaching program for my business. And there were all these people who were being so successful at creating programs like I have today. And because even though I would sit there and think, this is impossible, there's no way I could ever do that. And now, today, because of all these other people who were modeling and mirroring back to me what was possible, I kept saying, no, if they can do it, I can do it. So please go to lisashield.com, click the button to watch my free 45 minutes presentation. Stay to the very end, because that's where you can sign up for a breakthrough call with a member of my team.
Lisa Shield [00:38:35]:
And let us show you how we can actually help you get this solved. Even if you think it's impossible right now, even if you think God is going to bring you your guy, God helps those who help themselves. You need a plan and a path in a group of like minded women who can model this for you and coaches like Benjamin and me and Elizabeth and all the people on our team supporting you through this process. So let's get you past your ambivalence, okay? You don't have to stay stuck. You don't have to waste more press precious years, more christmases and new year's and Valentine's days and memorial days and birthdays alone. You can have it all, and we can show you how. So, please, let us help you find the guardian of your soul, because there are other guys out there like him. I know you're probably thinking, yeah, but Benjamin's a unicorn.
Lisa Shield [00:39:45]:
No, he's not. He's my guy. But there are plenty of benjamins out there, and we'll show you how to find them. I'm Lisa Shield.
Benjamin Shield [00:39:57]:
And I'm Benjamin Shield.
Lisa Shield [00:39:58]:
And thank you so much for joining us. We'll see you again next time.